More Chocolate Please

I've gone through more chocolate with this last break up than any other. Why? I have no idea!
It doesn't matter how much chocolate you eat, how much money you spend on new clothes to make you happy for a little bit. You'll still cry yourself to sleep, you'll still feel the emptiness in your heart. You cry because he's not being normal with you, then you cry when you two finally get to talk because your emotions go crazy around him! You're happy, you're sad, you're angry--all at the same time!
And then you just want to punch him in the face cause you're sick and he doesn't !*?$#@!*?*&#@!? care!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And then, of course, you cry some more.

But of course, you have to think to yourself, Why?
Still waiting for an answer...

Twenty One and Single!!!

So I've been spending time with family. I had decided that I wasn't going to write on my blog my entire trip, but obviously, that goal isn't going to work.
Let me tell you about my family's different ages.
Sam (boy) is 9; Anna is 11; Caden is 12; Jordan is 14; Jacob is 16; and Devin is 17. I'm 21. Then the adults are 40+. Any of the extra family we've spent time with is either a Devin's age or younger OR the older adults' ages. Talk about being singled out!
There are advantages to being the one and only. There's no one for them to compare me against or whatever. I've always enjoyed having my "alone time", but then there are times when I really do want to spend time with people my own age. So I really am hoping to spend some time with my friend, Sam (another boy), tonight or maybe tomorrow before I head home.
So all together, alone time is great, family time is grand, but spending time with people your own age is amazing!!!
And then there are definitely times when I would appreciate my family toning down the teasing. There's becoming a fine line between teasing and annoying. Like constantly reminding me that I still live at home. That I don't have a car. I'm not going on a mission. I'm not married. I'm not this or that. *SIGH!*
I like being 21 and single. I really do, but this is definitely one of those things where life isn't perfect and it's not always the way we want it to be.

If you don't understand this post, it's ok. I guess it's just one of those venting sessions. Kinda hard to vent when there's no one around YOUR OWN AGE!!!!

Life Sucks!

So life really sucks.
So the church and the country tell us how they want the young people to go out and get an education, but NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! They have to make it so freaking hard to get into school! If my old stupid school would've just let me stay, this wouldn't be a problem! But no, it's takes them months to get anything done. They don't know how to communicate with each other! They won't even talk to the co-worker that sits next to them in the same office!
I hate living here! I don't have any friends, they're all at college - WHERE I'M NOT!!! I just want to go home! I just...I want to live somewhere else! Somewhere where I have friends that I can see!
I'll admit that there are still times when I wish my life had ended with one of any of the ways I almost died in the past...