The Climb

So it's been a while since I've written anything and I decided that maybe I should at least update on something or another.
For those who don't know, my friend (or whatever we decide to call him), Patric, and I broke it off. We've gone our separate ways and haven't spoken to each other since October. Now while the whole "transition" was very difficult and hard, I've since moved on. I actually came across a newly recent picture of him today. He seemed happy and while part of me would like to message him and let him know how great I've been. I still know him well enough to know that he wouldn't take it too well. So if any of our friends read this and want to relay this post to him, they're more than welcome to tell him to read it. Just don't send it to him. But it is nice to see that he's doing well.
I was having a really rough time. But if I haven't mentioned that I have amazing friends, well....I HAVE AMAZING FRIENDS!!!!
There are so many thoughts going through my head right now, so I'm feeling that there's only one way to share them.

Oh how blessed I am. I have a Heavenly Father who loves me, and has shown me how important I am in His plan. He knows everything that I'm going to do before it even becomes an idea in my head, but He knows that no matter how good or bad, it's meant for me. He knows all that needs to be done to make me into the extraordinary woman that I need to become. And once I took the time to make Him the center of my world, everything else seemed to fall into place.
My brother, Austin, once told me that I still had so much that I needed to learn. I didn't like hearing it then, and just didn't believe him, but oh how right he was. There was so much I still had yet to learn. How much I would love to just wrap my arms around him, give him a big hug, and say, "Thank you. Thank you so much! For being you, for seeing what I was so naive to see! And best of all, still loving me!"
But what's even better is that when this life is over, we can go our Heavenly Father and his Son. We'd go up and give them a big hug. "Oh thank you for everything! For the good and the bad. For everything you gave me. For taking my aches, pains, and sins from me. For crying when I was crying, being there when I felt so lost, and giving me the lessons I needed to learn even though You knew it would hurt me. You did it all for me because you love me. And even though I did stupid things, you still loved me. You laughed with me, you cried with me, you smiled with me, and you were always there when I needed a helping hand to get up when I've fallen. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not realizing early enough that you truly do love me, for refusing to ask for help when I knew I couldn't do it alone, for forgetting you, for not always putting you first when you've never asked for much, for all the stupid things that I've done. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."
Tears then running down our faces, only to have Him hug us back, "There's no need to worry, my child. All the things you speak of isn't a thought in my mind. It never happened. I've forgiven you and completely forgotten it. You are my child. No matter what you do, good or bad, stupid or smart, I will always love you. And you don't need to worry about my forgiveness, I will always give it as long as you sincerely ask. I never enjoyed seeing you go through so much, but yes, I knew what needed to be done. If none of it happened, you would not be the sobbing child before me. You wouldn't be the extraordinary parent, teacher, and friend. I've always loved you, I never gave you anything but the best that I could. Would you ask for nothing less?"
A few tears slip away, "I wouldn't change a thing. Looking back I now know that all was for my benefit. And while I felt that I wasn't making a difference, I indeed was. Everyday was a fight for my life, and every night was a release of pain. As the time came to a close, how grateful I was for all the wonderful and painful experiences. Every little thing that shaped me into who I am. How I would hate to be anyone but the one that I am now. Oh how much I can see your love for me and how truly blessed I was."

Miley Cyrus - The Climb (worth listening to the song even if you don't like the artist)